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November 8th, 2022

wild_dreamer: (Rin - happy mask)
Tuesday, November 8th, 2022 05:12 pm
I wish…
I could just erase the last year, go back to March of last year and start over so I never make the stupid mistakes and maybe I wouldn’t screw everything up. Maybe we would still be friends. Maybe you would still talk to me.

I hate this. I hate that I can’t get you out of my head, I hate how much I hate myself for it. I just wish I could start over.

I wanted it for so long, but I should have just left it alone. I should have just crushed on you forever, because that was better than this sinking feeling of failure and rejection. Hell, even just rejection couldn’t kill my spark, but now I feel like the last coal smoldering in a wet fire pit, just waiting for my end as everything cools and crackles around me.