more story!

[wild_dreamer]

My other Lain story...

Fandom: Serial Experiments Lain
Title: Wonderland
Pairing: Alice/Lain
Rating: PG
Summary: Alice can't stop thinking about her....

A/N: This was written for Alara Rogers in the New Year Resolutions Challenge, 2004. Any mistakes z_rayne didn't catch are mine, and mine alone. Criticism is welcomed.

Disclaimer: Alas, not mine. I just play with them.


Wonderland


I can't seem to get that child out of my head. (Lain.) She looked so lost, and yet somehow right where she belonged. Familiar, yet I don't think I've ever known her. She assured me I had never seen her before. I wanted to take her home with me, keep her. Somehow, she seemed like she belonged in my life, and I can't explain my feelings for her.

A knock on my door startled me from my brooding. I was surprised to notice that it had become dark while I was lost in thought.

I was filled with a sudden feeling of warmth as I stood up from the couch and headed for the door. "I'm coming!"

I opened the door, only to find her (Lain) standing there, rain-soaked, smiling up at me like an angel. "Hello."

"L-lain?"

A sudden wariness in her features was quickly replaced with a smile. "You remember me, then."

I opened the door fully, stepping back so she could come in. "Yes. Iwakura Lain, isn't it?"

She nodded slightly as she stepped in, sliding her small feet out of her sandals. "Just call me Lain, though."

She still seemed too familiar somehow, like I knew her. Like I had known her intimately, once. She seemed suddenly older now, no longer the small child I'd met on the bridge that day. She stood almost shoulder-high on me. Her face was still childish, soft and sweet, but her eyes held all the wisdom of an old woman who had lived a full life and learned things the hard way, and her body was that of a young woman, supple and tough, wiry and flexible.

"How did you find out where I live?" My curiosity got the better of me again, the words slipping out before I could stop them.

She hesitated for a moment before answering, uncertainty flickering across her features. "I looked you up, of course. Silly Alice." She giggled softly, the innocent laugh of a child, but it sounded almost forced, nervous.

I smiled, briefly curious as to why she used the American pronunciation of my name, and then I wondered why it had even seemed important. "Yes, it is silly of me, isn't it. Please, have a seat." I turned on the lamp in the living room, and gestured at the couch where I had been sitting when she arrived. For a long moment I returned to my earlier contemplation of her.

She looked up at me, a confused (worried) frown crossing her face. "Aren't you going to come sit with me, Arisu?"

I blinked. "Oh. Yes, of course. I was just thinking.... What brings you here, Lain? And why alone?"

She flushed slightly, her gaze lowering to where her hands lay clasped in her lap. "I wanted to see you again is all. I'm sorry if I'm intruding.... I-I'll leave if you want me to." Her brown eyes glistened with tears, and I sat down beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

(Lain.)

"Shh.... No, I didn't mean that. Of course you can stay. And you aren't intruding, not at all."

She looked up at me, her face only inches from my own. "You sure?" She was so childlike there for a second, so innocent, like a young girl whose teddy bear had been found and given back by a complete stranger, and she wanted to make sure it was the same one.

I smiled softly. "I'm sure. You can stay as long as you want, Iwakura Lain."

The name echoed across my mind as she curled into me, silent tears sliding down her pale cheeks. "Thank you so much, Arisu-ai."

"You're welcome, beloved." I gathered her small (frail) body into my arms, comforting her as much as I could. Her tears subsided slowly, and finally she pulled away, and wiped her eyes on her sleeve.

"I'm sorry, Arisu, so sorry." Her eyes started to fill with tears again, and she stubbornly wiped them away.

"What for?"

"For everything. Everything I had anything to do with. Your past, your present, even your future. And for...this." She leaned close, one hand coming up behind my head as her mouth enveloped mine in a soft, sweet, loving kiss. I could feel each slender finger against the back of my head, could smell the rain in her hair, could taste the salt of her tears on her lips, and something inside snapped, memory came flooding back, and everything was....

(Lain.)

Everything was Lain, Iwakura Lain and Arisu Mizuki. Arisu and Lain. Her. Me. Us.

(Mine.)

She pulled away, and my eyes flew open. That face.... "Lain!"

"Yes. Lain. I am...Lain. And you...you are Alice Mizuki, schoolteacher, married, not mine." Her face was carefully controlled, her eyes blank. Her voice was soft as she added, "You were never really mine."

"I will be yours, Lain, if you want me. I think I forgave you a long time ago. I just didn't remember it." Something had changed, but I wasn't sure what. Everything seemed blurry, surreal.

(Love.)

A sudden spark of hope lit her eyes, and she kissed me again, this time passionate, demanding the truth. I returned her kiss, my own hand tangling in her short hair, still damp from the rain. She, all of her, was still damp from the rain, as she pushed me onto my back and pressed her whole body against mine, both of us needing to know that this was real.

(Real.)

I haven't felt real since she left me, so long ago.

(Time.... What is time?)

The clock on the wall chimed loudly.

The room went dark, as a loud rumble of thunder rolled through the thick air outside.

(Love.)

She leaned up on one elbow, her short hair framing her face as she looking into my eyes. "You remember. You remember it all, don't you? I'm so sorry, Arisu. I did it again...."

(Wait....)

She smiled sadly, tears filling her soft brown eyes again. "And now I have to undo it again. I'm so sorry, Ai."

(Lain! La-)




"Alice? Alice, wake up."




Sometimes I wonder.... What is through the looking glass for me?




(-----)



Owari

Comments

[zoerayne]

I still like this. *g*

[laylah.livejournal.com]

Aaaw. *snugs poor little Alice and Lain*
...I think I left you a review for this on the Yuletide archive, but in case I didn't -- so sweet! So adorable. And the experimental form really suits the series.