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This post is locked, musicspam ahoy.
Click for full song...
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
The angry boy a bit too insane
Icing over a secret pain
You know you don't belong
You're the first to fight
You're way too loud
You're the flash of light on a burial shroud
I know something's wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason
To say put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
Well he's on the table and he's gone to code
And I do not think anyone knows
What they're doing here
And your friends have left you
You've been dismissed
I never thought it would come to this
And I, I want you to know
Everyone's got to face down the demons
Maybe today
You could put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
Understand
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Can you put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
And I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
Jumper by Third Eye Blind
I have tried. I have tried harder than you realize, to stay your friend through all of this, to be supportive.
It's time to step back, lift my hands, and tell you straight up how I feel. I have been afraid of hurting you with the truth for too long. Now, it's time to just shut up and cope with the pain, because I need to say this, and you need to hear it.
I'm over you. I have moved on. Sometimes, yes, I still feel a bit sad for the fun times we used to have, but I understand that they are over, and aren't coming back. Stop living in the past.
You need to realize something. That person you want to be? You can't be that without actually putting some effort into it. You can't sit back and expect your life dreams to fall into your lap, that -isn't- how it works.
You don't see the problems in front of you, only the ones behind you. Turn around and walk forward, and you will stop tripping over the things that you don't see coming.
Who are you? Take a minute to look at yourself, and ask yourself that question, and then answer it -honestly-. And I'll answer it too.
You have a good heart, you have an idea in mind, but you have no motivation. You don't see the problems when they're right in front of you.
You're twenty-one. You can't hold down a job. Either you get fed up with the job, or you don't put in enough effort and they let you go. Usually a combination of both... You stop putting in any effort because you're fed up with the job, and then they get fed up with you and fire your ass.
You know what I wanted to say, when you told me you had skipped out on work to go to con? You are a total dumbass. That was the first solid, well-paying, stable job you've had since I met you. Don't throw it away like that.
And then you went ahead and did it anyways, you threw it away. You act too much on impulse, without thinking or planning, without thinking of the consequences of your actions.
And you know what? That isn't just going to suddenly change, you aren't suddenly, randomly going to be able to be an adult. You still aren't an adult. I have grown up, even just since we broke up, and you haven't changed.
You need to see that there are things that need changed. You need to recognize the problems, even if you don't want to change them. Honestly, I don't care if you change them, I just want you to acknowledge them. Denial is not just a river in Egypt.
It hurts me to watch you dig yourself deeper into this hole. You say that the Rogues are there for you, and are supportive.. but what I'm hearing out of your words is this: "They tell me what I want to hear, they offer me crutches instead of letting me stand on my own, and they get me falling-down drunk so I don't have to think about things."
THINK, for fuck's sake! Work problems out, don't just hide behind booze until it goes away! I worry about you. Your friends worry about you.
I want you to think about the consequences before you take action. You never did have good impulse control, and it's not going to fix itself.
This is coming from someone who has been there. Every step of the way, it is a fight, but you can't give up. You give up too easily. I'm always hearing "oh it's too hard" and it is time for me to tell you to shut the fuck up and deal with it. I know you always got mad with me for saying shit like that when we were together, but that's just because you didn't want to admit that I was right, most of the time.
When life gives you lemons? Fucking shut up and make lemonade. You don't have the sugar? Well, how can you fix that? Go buy some. Don't just stare at the lemons and wait for them to juice themselves, don't wait for sugar to randomly show up in front of you, because it won't. You have to go for what is truly important to you.
Was getting drunk with your friends at con really worth more to you than a steady job?
Stop sabotaging yourself, and get your act together. I was proud of you for a while, when I heard you were finally doing something for yourself. You had a job, a girlfriend, a place to live, you were back in school. And then, one by one, I watched you throw those things away because you were acting on impulse, without thinking!
I cannot believe I feel like I'm lecturing a kid, here, but that's what it sounds like. Your parents did a terrible job of raising you, and you're going to end up just like them; a mother who was only there when it was convenient for her to be, and an alcoholic, apathetic, negligent father.
Open your fucking eyes. Learn to be a fucking adult.
I know that you're going to be pretty mad at me after all that I have said, but I feel like it all needed to come out. Especially since your last couple of journal entries were full of you wondering what was wrong with you.. well, now you know.
I locked this post so only you can see it, so don't worry about that..
I'm sorry.
( ETA: Now unlocked. )
Click for full song...
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
The angry boy a bit too insane
Icing over a secret pain
You know you don't belong
You're the first to fight
You're way too loud
You're the flash of light on a burial shroud
I know something's wrong
Well everyone I know has got a reason
To say put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
Well he's on the table and he's gone to code
And I do not think anyone knows
What they're doing here
And your friends have left you
You've been dismissed
I never thought it would come to this
And I, I want you to know
Everyone's got to face down the demons
Maybe today
You could put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
You could cut ties with all the lies that you've been living in
And if you do not want to see me again I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
I would understand
Understand
Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah
Can you put the past away
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
And I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend
I would understand
Jumper by Third Eye Blind
I have tried. I have tried harder than you realize, to stay your friend through all of this, to be supportive.
It's time to step back, lift my hands, and tell you straight up how I feel. I have been afraid of hurting you with the truth for too long. Now, it's time to just shut up and cope with the pain, because I need to say this, and you need to hear it.
I'm over you. I have moved on. Sometimes, yes, I still feel a bit sad for the fun times we used to have, but I understand that they are over, and aren't coming back. Stop living in the past.
You need to realize something. That person you want to be? You can't be that without actually putting some effort into it. You can't sit back and expect your life dreams to fall into your lap, that -isn't- how it works.
You don't see the problems in front of you, only the ones behind you. Turn around and walk forward, and you will stop tripping over the things that you don't see coming.
Who are you? Take a minute to look at yourself, and ask yourself that question, and then answer it -honestly-. And I'll answer it too.
You have a good heart, you have an idea in mind, but you have no motivation. You don't see the problems when they're right in front of you.
You're twenty-one. You can't hold down a job. Either you get fed up with the job, or you don't put in enough effort and they let you go. Usually a combination of both... You stop putting in any effort because you're fed up with the job, and then they get fed up with you and fire your ass.
You know what I wanted to say, when you told me you had skipped out on work to go to con? You are a total dumbass. That was the first solid, well-paying, stable job you've had since I met you. Don't throw it away like that.
And then you went ahead and did it anyways, you threw it away. You act too much on impulse, without thinking or planning, without thinking of the consequences of your actions.
And you know what? That isn't just going to suddenly change, you aren't suddenly, randomly going to be able to be an adult. You still aren't an adult. I have grown up, even just since we broke up, and you haven't changed.
You need to see that there are things that need changed. You need to recognize the problems, even if you don't want to change them. Honestly, I don't care if you change them, I just want you to acknowledge them. Denial is not just a river in Egypt.
It hurts me to watch you dig yourself deeper into this hole. You say that the Rogues are there for you, and are supportive.. but what I'm hearing out of your words is this: "They tell me what I want to hear, they offer me crutches instead of letting me stand on my own, and they get me falling-down drunk so I don't have to think about things."
THINK, for fuck's sake! Work problems out, don't just hide behind booze until it goes away! I worry about you. Your friends worry about you.
I want you to think about the consequences before you take action. You never did have good impulse control, and it's not going to fix itself.
This is coming from someone who has been there. Every step of the way, it is a fight, but you can't give up. You give up too easily. I'm always hearing "oh it's too hard" and it is time for me to tell you to shut the fuck up and deal with it. I know you always got mad with me for saying shit like that when we were together, but that's just because you didn't want to admit that I was right, most of the time.
When life gives you lemons? Fucking shut up and make lemonade. You don't have the sugar? Well, how can you fix that? Go buy some. Don't just stare at the lemons and wait for them to juice themselves, don't wait for sugar to randomly show up in front of you, because it won't. You have to go for what is truly important to you.
Was getting drunk with your friends at con really worth more to you than a steady job?
Stop sabotaging yourself, and get your act together. I was proud of you for a while, when I heard you were finally doing something for yourself. You had a job, a girlfriend, a place to live, you were back in school. And then, one by one, I watched you throw those things away because you were acting on impulse, without thinking!
I cannot believe I feel like I'm lecturing a kid, here, but that's what it sounds like. Your parents did a terrible job of raising you, and you're going to end up just like them; a mother who was only there when it was convenient for her to be, and an alcoholic, apathetic, negligent father.
Open your fucking eyes. Learn to be a fucking adult.
I know that you're going to be pretty mad at me after all that I have said, but I feel like it all needed to come out. Especially since your last couple of journal entries were full of you wondering what was wrong with you.. well, now you know.
I locked this post so only you can see it, so don't worry about that..
I'm sorry.
( ETA: Now unlocked. )
